What Not To Wear

I have to confess, whenever I go to the pet store to get crickets for that infernal gecko of mine, I linger just a little longer than I need to at the doggie apparel rack. I actually consider it ridiculous when people dress their dogs in anything (and those rain slickers for dogs are beyond reproach) but I have to admit, the buyer for Petco has good taste and I’ve come this close to buying peace-sign laden cardigans for my friend’s Shiba Inus.

But that’s fashion. Whether it has any place on dogs is not for me to say.

The specimen you see here was walking alongside Laura the Tennis Pro and me as we were leaving the US Open. She snapped a quick picture and we went on our way. I’d completely forgotten about this bedecked pooch, taken as I was with Melanie Oudin that day and then for the next few. In fact, I think Laura the Tennis Pro even forgot about him until she read my post about the dog riding the motorcycle.

But here he is, looking more like he’s leaving a Grateful Dead show than the Billie Jean King National Tennis Center. My main issue with doggie clothing is that it’s all just a little too precious. And it seems undignified for a dog to require layering. This dude, however, is neither fending off the cold nor hoping to end up as a Glamour “Do.” He’s making a statement, although I’d be hard pressed to say what it is.

I’m thinking a total makeover is in order. And if nothing else, lose the pipe. It’s just downright pretentious.